bride and groom making grand entrance to guests at outdoor wedding

How do you politely tell your guests that you have decided to downsize your wedding?

Written By Guest Editor: Kristie Jones
Due to the many uncertainties going on right now in the world, so many couples have had to make the very hard decision to dramatically downsize their wedding day. Including those guests that were once invited. From having to cancel caterers, reconsidering the wedding venue that’s already been booked months in advance, but also one of the hardest parts, which is knowing that you have to contact close friends, family, and other’s to “un-invite” them from what was supposed to be one of the most important days of your life. How do you politely tell someone that they are no longer able to attend your wedding without upsetting them, or ruining a lifetime friendship? Here are several options that you can consider when you’re faced with these types of difficult situations.

One way to extend your apologies, to let your friends, co-workers and even extended family know that you have decided to downsize your wedding is to send an email explaining your decision. Politely explain your reasons why, and let them know that once it is safe to celebrate together you will definitely be in touch. Another great way that you can do this if you prefer not to email, is to send out change of plans announcements. Maybe consider calling immediate family and close friends to explain the situation directly so not to hurt feelings or potentially jeopardize a close friendship.

There are several great ways that former guests can still see the ceremony without attending in person. One way is to have someone in charge of streaming the ceremony live. You can do this using several different social media platforms so that friends and family are still able to see your special day from the comfort of their home. Maybe even consider setting up a laptop or iPad to stream the event using a more private platform such as Zoom. Your guests are able watch live, then once the ceremony is over you can stop by the laptop or iPad to thank everyone for watching and have the ability to read all of the comments at a later time. Some couples prefer to engage with their guests once the ceremony is over. Ultimately it’s up to “you” as the couple, as to what makes sense for your wedding.

These are just a few ideas on ways to politely “un-invite” guests to your wedding. It saves you, as the couple from possibly hurting someone’s feelings, but also offers alternate solutions so that your former guests have the option to virtually share your memorable day with you. Hopefully some of these ideas may help ease your mind some when faced with this difficult decision, and still be able to have those closest to you share your special day with you.

Image via Junebug Weddings

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1 comment

Love this article. Kristie, Y O U R O CK !


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